Bitter Wives Club

•Well SassyPant’s 8th birthday is coming up.  Her father’s parents are taking her to Disney to pretend like they give a shit about her and to piss me off surprise her so we had to have her party on a different day.  We asked her what kind of party she wanted and much to our [...]

So every time I sit down to write I realize how incredibly fucking boring my life is.  No really.  Unless you want to hear about LB’s new found controls over his bowels and bladder, which God knows you don’t, then I have nothing to say.  But since when has that ever stopped me?  Exactly. Isn’t [...]

SassyPants has been on a couple of road trips this summer. To help with the boredom of the last one (to South friggin Dakota), I bought her this journal type thing that she could fill in. I was flipping through it to see how much she had gotten done when I found something that couldn’t [...]

So BWC is now a year old.  It was actually a year old in February I suppose, since that’s when we bought the domain and such and then it took us several weeks to figure out what theme we would use (read: two most of the indecisive people ON THE PLANET) and then a few [...]

WTF. ♦Dill pickle chips. Look, dill pickle is an excellent flavor for say… pickles, but it’s not great on chips… even Pringles. I will not grocery shop hungry. I will not grocery shop hungry. I will not grocery shop hungry…¹ ♦H1N1.  This goddamn swine flu is becoming a major pain in my ass.  I’m literally [...]

As previously discussed, Sassy Pants is a bleeding heart animal lover¹ who insists all of the meat she eats come from single males. Sorry, single adult males. She even made me install an app on the iPhone that can determine whether or not the fish we’ve just caught is male or female, single or married, [...]

•How is my dog less like a dog and more like an obstacle course? •LB is right, I should understand that “WAAAAHAAAAADEEEEEEEEYAHHHHHHHHHH” means peanut butter and jelly and when he says he wants to watch Diego I should know that he actually doesn’t want to watch Diego, he really wants to watch the Backyardigans. •Uh, [...]

SP has always been a cheeky one (hence the name Sassy Pants).  Since the minute she could speak she’s had an attitude.  It was totally normal to hear things like “I guess SOMEBODY needs to go back to college!” coming out of her little smart (but absolutely adorable) mouth.  That’s why it didn’t surprise me [...]

There’s a reason that Coco’s daughter has the loving nickname of “Sassy Pants”. It’s because she truly has the sassiest pants of them all. She’s probably the smartest 6 year old that I’ve ever encountered. The things she comes up with just blow me away sometimes — including this conversation: SP: “Viv, did you know [...]

If I remove my reproductive system, will one of you ladies harvest and pass a child through your system for me? I promise I’ll let you name it whatever you want — because those are the rules, right?